So...is this what it's come to? This is an actual sign on a gas pump in Southeast DC. Once again, the oil companies passed on a great opportunity to employ the art of sarcasm while driving home the importance of punctuation. My revisions follow...
- Gasoline is harmful or fatal if swallowed? Since when?
- Long-term exposure to vapors has caused cancer in laboratory animals, but what the hell does that have to do with you?
- Avoid prolonged breathing of vapors; we've already been warned by Biz Markie.
- Keep face away from nozzle and gas tank, for there are easier ways to measure how much gas is in your tank. The gas gauge, for example, is an excellent indicator.
- Keep away from eyes and skin; safe for hair.
- Never siphon by mouth; choose a better method.
- For use as motor fuel only. The term, "fuel your excitement" is a complex metaphor. Lucky you! Your excitement doesn't really require gas. You'd be perpetually depressed at these prices if it were.
As always, thanks for your time and attention.
As Always, thanks for your (Wise-Dome)
ReplyDeleteAndraya A. Arrington